What Your Recurring, Frustrating Issue Is Telling You
If you have a frustrating issue about which you feel you’ve done a lot of “letting go” and shifting but it’s still showing up on the unwanted side of the stick, congratulations. You can give yourself a pat on the back for officially entering the next level of your spiritual awakening.
That might sound confusing so let me give you an example to illustrate what I mean. A friend of mine was going through a divorce. As you might have guessed, it was a turbulent time in her life for sure. Lucky for me (and her), I had just been through my own turbulent time in my life, but was happily and officially on the other side – full of wisdom that I was enthusiastic to share. She came to me often with questions and looking for clarity.
On one such occasion, she came to me feeling quite defeated and trapped. You see, she was the initiator of the break up. She felt she and he had grown in very different directions and that they both would be far happier and better off moving on. But, as often happens in relationships when one pulls away the other clings, and that’s what he did. Her spouse wanted to stay married…very badly. She didn’t want to hurt him, so she didn’t push it. Instead, she went to work on herself. She focused on taking control of her emotional state, doing as much positive expectation work as she could, reading, learning, meditating, etc., etc.
In the meantime, she and her husband decided to sell some of their assets. In her mind, the proceeds from the sales would give her the financial resources to move out of their marital home. Fast forward 3-4 months later, following her very diligent mental shifting work, she received a big blow. The assets that were on the market hadn’t sold yet. And it didn’t look like they would sell anytime in the future.
That’s when she came to me feeling disheartened, frustrated and trapped. She asked me what could she possibly be doing wrong? Before I tell you my answer (which is REALLY good so keep reading), I want to point out that this is a very common place to find yourself when you ARE shifting your mindset and your energy.
Maybe you have found yourself in a similar situation. It doesn’t have to be specific to your intimate relationship. It could be a situation with your finances, your health, your weight, your career, your relationship with a family member or friend. No matter what, it goes like this: you find yourself facing something unwanted (or the absence of wanted), which caused you to get clear on your desire, which caused you to focus on shifting your emotional state to a better feeling place because you know there is a big gap between what is and what is wanted, which caused you to feel better. But then BAM! You get hit right smack in the face with the exact same unwanted thing or situation that began this whole circus. You end up feeling deflated, defeated, confused, frustrated, maybe even angry and questioning why. You find yourself seeking wisdom and answers from anybody or thing.
So the reason I said congratulations, and that you have graduated in your spiritual awakening is that you have! The “crisis” caused you to focus enough that you have discovered your inner power. The crisis caused you to find your self soothing mechanism and has resulted in your practicing of your creative power. The more you use this, the better you get at it. So any opportunity to practice it, is good for you :).
So why are you getting hit smack in the face with the same unwanted situation? Does this spiritual mindset stuff even work? Here’s what I told my friend and what I would tell you if you came to me with the same questions:
1) The existence of the same unwanted situation indicates that you are still putting out the vibe of the unwanted. In essence, you still have active focus on the unwanted. Everything that is showing up in your life is an indicator of the vibe you are putting out. But don’t cry over spilled milk yet. It’s just an indicator. And you can continue to do the work to clean it up. Just because you have been cleaning up the vibe doesn’t mean it goes away immediately. Which takes me to point #2.
2) You are taking score too early. When you have a train moving at 60mph in one direction and you want it to move 60 mph in the opposite direction, it doesn’t happen immediately. The process requires a slowing down until stopped and then a slow motion forward until it gains enough momentum to be going at top speed.in the opposite direction. Another analogy for you…when you plant the bamboo seed, it takes 5 or 6 years before the first sprout appears from the dirt. You wouldn’t dig up the seed 3 weeks later and demand that it sprout for you.
3) You’ve got ulterior motives in your emotional fitness regime that are not serving you. In other words, the mindset work or cleaning up you’ve been doing….you’ve been doing for the wrong reason. You’ve been doing it to get the wanted. You have an orientation of, “OK, if I focus on what I want, then what I want will come.” Believe it or not, this is the wrong orientation. You should be doing the cleaning up of the vibration work because it feels better. Not for the ulterior motive of getting what you want. Why? Because when you are doing it for the reason of manifesting what you want, you actually reinforce your conditional love. What you are aiming for is an ability to practice unconditional love. That is, feeling good no matter what condition faces you. And when you are practicing doing it BECAUSE you want the wanted condition, you naturally take score too early (back at #2).
The takeaways here are:
First, celebrate that you have reached a new level in your spiritual awakening. You ARE shifting your energy towards what is wanted. Continue doing the cleaning up work.
Second, let go of your desire to take score. In other words, release your constant focus on the gap between where you are and where you want to be. Instead, make peace with where you are. Find satisfaction in the clarity of your desire and feel the fun, eager anticipation of how it will show up for you.
Third, refocus your intention towards that of feeling better and NOT because you want the thing you don’t have.
And there you have it. The gift of the recurring frustrating issue!