Why It’s Not About Earning Success

I wonder if you can relate to the following? You do everything right. You bend over backwards for your client. You over-deliver. On the marketing front, you spent weeks re-doing your website, you send a weekly e-zine, you are active on Facebook, you go to networking events, you exhibit at festivals and all this while you run your business and tend to clients. Nonetheless, you feel like you haven’t accomplished quite enough. There are others who do more than you. You go to bed at night thinking, if I just worked a little harder, I would deserve my success. If only I could be as good as “Janet” at ______, I would earn my success.

From the day we are born as human beings, we are spoon fed to believe that we have to work for what we want. The more money you want to make, the harder you have to work. We like people who earn their success (classic self-made millionaires) and have a distaste for those that found success without work (case in point – Kim Kardashian.)

Where did this nonsense come from? The belief that it’s only acceptable to have success (or joy, or love, or happiness) if you earn it? Why must it be hard work? What if – success can be yours and it has nothing to do with earning it? What I would like to share with you is that it’s true – success has nothing to do with how hard you work or if you “earn” it. Instead, success has to do with “aligning” with it. And aligning with success can happen without hard work. In fact, hard work prevents you from aligning with it. So if you are feeling exhausted and that you are working way too hard, then maybe it’s time to learn how to align with success instead of earning it.

Here are some ways to begin the process of aligning with success:

1. Make peace with where you are.

The opposite of aligning with success is resisting it. When you are taking score and noticing the lack of success going on in your business, you bring up resistance. The quickest and easiest way to release the resistance is to make peace with where you are right now. You can’t make progress without making peace with where you are, so accept it.

2. Stop noticing what’s NOT going right.

You might be having technical difficulties, you might have demanding clients, or you might not be getting results from a major marketing campaign – yet. So what! Stop talking about it. Stop putting your focus on it.

3. Start noticing what IS going right.

At any given point in time, we have lots of things going right, and most likely, fewer things going wrong. So why is it that our focus goes straight to that which is going wrong? Stop noticing what’s going wrong and put your focus on what’s going right. No matter how tempting it might be to complain, put more focus on what’s going right in your business or your life. There is lots to be grateful for. This tip is your instruction to find time for gratitude. What is going right? When was the last time you celebrated your successes, no matter how small?

4. Stop talking about where you are.

Everything is changing. So if you feel stuck, it’s only because you continue to focus on what is, and thus you keep bringing more of what is. Stop talking about what is right now. Stop finding reasons why “it” won’t work.

5. Start talking about where you are going.

There is no such thing as “jinxing” it. Talk about where you want to go. How does it feel to be on that path? Let yourself indulge in that feeling. You must find the feeling of where you want to go before it will show up for you.


Catch yourself when you hear the self talk pushing you to work harder, earn more clients, more bookings and more success. When you do, take a moment and then go through these 5 steps. They will work like a charm. Do this long enough, you will find you can create a new belief that it’s not about earning success, it’s about aligning with it.

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